Mom’s Dirty Little Secret- 25 Moms Share Their Dirty Little Secrets

Looking at our friends social media accounts, we see smiling faces and what look to be perfect parents. Have you ever wondered: “Whats that Mom’s dirty little secret?” We all have them! I promise you. 

Mom's Dirty Little Secret

No one is perfect and as Moms, sometimes we cut corners, tell white lies to our kids and even scream at them and say things we don’t mean. It happens. I say we need to flaunt our imperfections! Own them. Spread the word! Who cares if we aren’t perfect? After all, perfection is boring.

This Mom’s Dirty Little Secrets

I have many dirty little secrets that I use in my daily life. One of them is that I generally eat things I don’t want to share with my kids, over the sink in the kitchen. I watch over my shoulder every second to make sure they aren’t coming in, and if I hear movement, whatever I am eating gets thrown into the sink on top of a clean plate for later secret consumption. Watch the Video Below… 

I also tend to skip pages of books during story time to speed up the process. The kids haven’t noticed yet, but on the nights that I just want them to get the heck into bed and go to darn sleep, I may skip many pages. 

25 Moms Share Their Dirty Little Secrets

I found 25 Moms with dirty little secrets of their own to share! I am not alone and neither are you.

“My kids ask me where their chocolate or candy is and I say I don’t know you need to keep track of your stuff… I help them look and say this knowing I ate it”Anonymous

“On nights that’s I’m exhausted but have so much to do, I give my kids the option of TV before bed rather than cuddling up with me for a book…so bad but so necessary sometimes” – Anonymous

“When my daughter wanted to eat organic spaghetti like the cool kid at daycare I cooked up the no-name stuff I had in the cupboard and told her it was organic.” Mommy Outside the Box

 “My patience does wear thin, I yell sometimes and even have said “shut up” before.” -Anonymous

“I let my kid eat way more sweets then what I probably should.” – Anonymous

“I don’t give my kids a bath every night. I never have. My oldest was about a week old before she got her first bath at home. Since then, I’ve bathed all my kids about twice a week (depending on how busy we are). My midwife told me after my third daughter that this was okay; bathing too much can cause dry skin (which my third suffers from). And our evenings are often so busy it’s hard to fit in bath time, plus I’m usually doing bedtime routine by myself so it’s short and sweet.” The Koala Bear Writer

“Sometimes I let my 2 year old have his soother all day long when he’s cranky, but lie to other people and say he only has it at bedtime when they criticize me that he still has one.” – Anonymous

“When my daughter was little, I used to put on Dragon Tales because it was the ONLY time she would sit still for a half hour…I would fall asleep the minute the show started and wake up to the credits. And she was never the wiser and I have an awesome power nap!” – Anonymous

“I’ve eaten chocolate/cookies/(insert goodie here) in the bathroom to avoid sharing with the kids.”  A Motherhood Experience

“I eat the whole bag of “Extreme Cheddar” goldfish (I’m addicted to those ones). Then when my daughter wants them, I told her daddy ate them all.” -Anonymous

“One day about five years ago when my oldest was around four years old we had had a tough day together. When I was putting him to bed I thought I had said this kind of under my breath, “why do you piss me off so much?”He has definitely heard me and his response in a sweet little boy voice was, “because I love to piss you off!” – Anonymous

“I’ve sent my son to school in yesterday’s underwear, because I didn’t get around to laundry. But, in my defense, I made sure they passed the sniff test first.” Raising My Boys

“I have told my daughter there is a pee monster in her closet and if she pees her pants he will get her, she hasn’t had an accident since..” – Anonymous

“When my mother in law comes over I dress the kids in fancy clothes, usually we are just in our pajamas all day.” – Anonymous

“I use the “circle of neglect” as I call it. Many know it as the baby octagon. When I need a shower, or to eat in the kitchen in peace I pop the babe in our circle of neglect, turn on Bubble Guppies (hey they’re great babysitters) so I may get 5 minutes of me time!” Extreme Couponing Mom

“On the really tough days, when kids are screaming and I feel like I am going to loose it, I pretend I am going to the bathroom, but I am really in there having a good cry!” – Anonymous

“I have let the TV babysit my kids almost all day when I feel overwhelmed” – Anonymous

“Sometimes I sneak the kids candy and blame it on the DOG! lol!!! They usually come up with that conclusion first so I just go with it!!” – 1Heart1Family

 “When people ask me if I breastfeed, I lie and tell them I do. I know breast is best and I have tried it but it didn’t work out and I am tired of arguing with people about it.” – Anonymous

“Sometimes when people come to the door I will pretend I am not here so I don’t have to put a bra on.” -Anonymous

“I feed my 15 month old daughter way more puff treats when shopping to keep her happy and quiet than I ever would at home.” – Extreme Couponing Mom

“I fake sick so my husband has to stay home from work to take care of the kids when I need a break, I can’t get one any other way.” – Anonymous

“I lie to my kids about things being broken so I don’t have to hear them ie: Any loud toys..” – Anonymous

“I don’t know why, but my 12 year old Autistic son hates casseroles. However feeding a large family on a budget means that casseroles are one of the meals I can make to feed a crowd without killing our finances. So I cook casseroles but we NEVER use the word “casserole” when he asks what’s for dinner. We call it a “bake”, a “hot dish”, or some other word. The entire family is in on it…and threatened to never utter the word “casserole” when describing what’s for dinner. He will eat it if we call it something else, but the minute you utter the dreaded “C” word he refuses to eat.” – Crock Pot Ladies

“I have considered running away before. Not seriously, but the thought has crossed my mind many times.” -Anonymous

See!? You are not alone. 

Thank you to all the wonderful Moms that shared their dirty little secrets! 

Do you have any Mom’s Dirty Little Secrets?



  1. mommyoutside on April 16, 2015 at 11:12 am

    Oh man I LOVE those extreme goldfish too!!!

    • Ninja Mommers on April 17, 2015 at 11:16 am

      I personally know (family) the woman who submitted that, she submitted under anonymous and I totally called her on it the next day! She laughed so hard that it was that obvious.

  2. Monica Starr Bender on April 18, 2015 at 12:55 am

    I tell my kids that if they behave badly (kick or scream) in the car they will cause an accident and we will all have to go live in the hospital forever, and since they are kids they’d have to live at a kids hospital away from mommy and we wouldn’t get to see each other. Harsh and Dramatic I know but my kids are awesome in the car even on long trips. Also I can totally relate to hiding to eat I don’t get it, why does everything delicious have to be shared with them and you can’t give them their own they need yours!!

  3. orangeheromama on May 19, 2015 at 11:03 am

    O…M….G! LOVE this post! I am guilty of quite a few of those!! (eek!)

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