Mom Shaming. Have you done it? Are you the kind of Mom that watches other Mother’s every move and form a negative opinion on them?
Have you ever found yourself whispering to your friend in the grocery store line about the way the Mother in front of you is parenting her screaming toddler?
When your girlfriend reveals to you that her 4 year old still uses a soother at night to sleep, do you think to yourself: “What an idiot.”?
At school drop off, have you laughed to yourself about the Mother that looks like she just crawled out of bed, thinking how lazy she is?
If you have participated in anything even similar to the above, be it online, behind close doors or in public, you have participated in Mom Shaming. Mom Shaming is a huge part of the Mommy Wars! Who wants to be at war with other Mothers?! Really!? We all need to support each other! I have said before: Motherhood is NOT a Competition, so STOP making it one.
5 Reasons you Participate in Mom Shaming
“Joey’s Mom” comes to the school with pinterest worthy cupcakes with cute little designs on the top. “Pfft, she probably has a Nanny to have that much time.” “Perhaps she should focus on her looks a little more and the cupcakes wouldn’t be the only things that looked good.” You’re Jealous. Maybe you aren’t as great at decorating cupcakes, but you don’t have to be!
In all reality, you are just plain tired and grumpy.
Being a Mother can be frustrating. Especially when you go online and see how “perfect” everyone else’s life looks. Here you are, covered in Cheerios with Peanut butter in your hair and your friend Jenny is smiling in a beautiful family photo with a beautifully coiffed hairdo. That isn’t her every day reality and it isn’t yours either. Relax.
You have been feeling trapped lately. Not necessarily by your family, but more so by responsibility in general. Sometimes adult hood can smack you in the face. You know you are an adult, you know you have lots of responsibility but sometimes it can just pile on so heavily that you feel like you are drowning. Make sure you find some time for yourself, but spend it in a more positive way than Mom Shaming.
5. You are Questioning YOUR Skills
The truth is, that you couldn’t breastfeed due to medical issues, so when you look at the lady in the mall with her child happily breastfeeding and express how “disgusting” that is in public. It’s because you feel inadequate. Stop projecting what you feel are your inadequacies on other people and spend that time perfecting the things you CAN control.
Mom Shaming and the Mommy Wars are both awful. We need to support each other and stop shaming each other.