Mirrors, Moo-Moo’s and Stretch Marks

Motherhood happens so fast! It seems like one day you are partying with your friends, spending your week worrying about what amazingly fun thing you will do with your Friday night and then when plans are made you spend all day Friday preparing for them… because hey, you’re young, you’re hot and those jeans just make your ass look amazing! Then…. BAM! You are spending your week wondering what you are making for dinner, and then when the week is done you spend all day Friday picking cheerios out of your hair and avoiding the mirror… because hey, you’re still kinda young but don’t feel it, you’re covered in stretch marks and you haven’t worn jeans in ages (except those awful maternity jeans that make your ass look like a box).

Women with fat

I love being a Mother, don’t get me wrong. If I didn’t, I would not have had another baby. BUT sometimes I miss the excitement of getting dressed up in that new hot little outfit to go and do something needless on a Friday night… and I miss that new hot little outfit being a tight pair of jeans and a cute (OK slutty) little shirt instead of a Moo Moo because nothing else fits. Sometimes I am tempted to just wrap myself in a giant mattress… Hey at least it wouldn’t hurt when I took my usual tumble down the damned stairs.

THEN I find myself feeling guilty because I am thinking how much I miss my former body when I should just love myself.. hey the stretch marks are my marks of Motherhood…. BUT THE MOO MOO!? Ok, I can’t come to terms with THAT! Either way, The negative self talk thing has become a problem. If I am so unhappy with my body then I can lose weight, doesn’t matter if I have stretch marks or a little extra skin… maybe I should work on looking good with clothes on…. But then I NEVER do it… and the cycle continues…. and not the kinda cycle that gets me in shape… no no not a bicycle… the kinda cycle that doesn’t help me at all…

I know that the way I look isn’t important to my kids… but it is to me and so I’ve made it a bigger issue than it should be. Especially when parenting itself isn’t easy, and THAT is a whole other can of worms… those are separate struggles.

Being a Mom is different than just looking out for yourself and that is common knowledge, but I really need to learn to love myself and my body whether its a size 5 or size 25.

I love my children and they are totally worth all of it.

What is something you struggle with about yourself now that you are a Mother, if anything at all? Or I am the only one!? Ugh.

20 Comments

  1. gingermommy on January 13, 2012 at 3:12 pm

    I have been a mom for almost 18 year, 4 kids. Each time I have a baby or a year passes different things bother me. at first I felt like I had no patience, then I was in a rut and wore sweats forever. Then I had 2 boys in two years and got hips that would not go away lol Now not much. I am what I am. I however have become overly emotional at times and feel alot of mom guilt even though I really do not have a life lol

    • Kelly @ City Mom on January 13, 2012 at 3:38 pm

      Mom guilt is the worst! Why or why do we do it to ourselves?

    • Ninja Mommers on January 13, 2012 at 8:01 pm

      I get Mom Guilt A LOT. And I NEVER GO ANYWHERE OR DO ANYTHING except for them! Its insane.

  2. Kelly @ City Mom on January 13, 2012 at 3:37 pm

    Are you inside my head? I so feel the same way and I bet on some level we all do. If you happen to read my post today, it’s sort of similar in that I am going out next weekend and I feel all unprepared and out of my element.

    It’s weird how it happens so fast! Like you said, BAM!

    I love this part “Sometimes I am tempted to just wrap myself in a giant mattress…” that’s what I’d like to change about myself. I can’t seem to find contentment with my body. I am active, eat healthy and should be happy with how I look but I just am not. I can’t get the image of the ‘old me’ out of my head!

    • Ninja Mommers on January 13, 2012 at 8:03 pm

      LOL @ Are you inside my Head?

      See, I don’t DO anything for myself. I NEED to but I just don’t. I Don’t have an excuse to look this way.. except pregnancy. LOL.

      But I can’t get the image of the “Old” me out of my head either. Always looking back.. always wishing the body had of stayed… and still have my children lol

  3. MommyRed on January 13, 2012 at 3:55 pm

    I can relate, oh boy can I ever relate.
    I am not a fan of looking at pictures of the “old” me because I get all pouty and dream of having that body back… Or do I? I love my baby, she’s amazing and pregnancy was awesome too… But I just miss my body…
    I miss having to wear a bra to make my ladies look perky… If I don’t wear one now they flop in every direction and point upwards, downwards and can be basically used as a compass… You can use my stretch marks as a maze… Ah well. This is the risk we take when we have babies!
    But that doesn’t mean I can’t want my body back.

    • Kelly @ City Mom on January 13, 2012 at 4:10 pm

      Eactly! I wouldn’t change anything about motherhood expect the body thing. If we could keep just as it was before then life would be perfect!

  4. HelloKittyNinja on January 13, 2012 at 4:34 pm

    I have suffered with weight problems a good chunk of my life. I maxed out at 235lbs when I was 16, then by the time I was 20 I weighed 135lbs. I am afraid to step on a scale since the last time I did that had me weighing in at 160lbs, I tottaled 193lbs during pregnancy.
    I have made fun of for my weight my entie life and when I look in a mirror I feel disgusted with myself. I hate the extra skin that I’ve had since losing the teenage pounds, I can never get rid of it without surgery. I feel ugly and fat and disgusting, so much to the point I have practically stopped eating. What scares me most is my son laying on me when he’s older and going “Mommy! You’re soft and squishy!” Like I did to my mom! I haven’t seen a pair of jeans in months, I hate looking at my old wardrobe, nothing fits! I have 5 shirts 2 tracks and 1 pair of maternity pants to wear cause nothing else fits! I want to crawl in a hole.

    • Ninja Mommers on January 13, 2012 at 8:04 pm

      I think you are beautiful Mama. Inside and Out.

      Little man has told me how soft and squishy I am… BOO 🙁 It does suck.

  5. LaQuita (Just Us Girls) on January 13, 2012 at 4:35 pm

    I know the feeling. I love being a mom, but I do miss getting dolled up every day and spending my weekends partying it up with my girlfriends. This is why at least once a month my girlfriends and I still get dressed up, have drinks and either go to our single friends house so we can just have a girls night in or go out a couple times a year downtown to just dance, lol, this makes a huge difference for me because when I get home or that following week it’s like a refresh button for me and I’m good to go.

    I’ve been a WAHM for the last six years. I don’t regret it whatsoever because I loved seeing my kids firsts of everything. Now that they are both in school full time I’m thinking about going back to work in a hospital with co-workers so that I can talk to other adults, get dressed every day, do my hair every day and get out the house. LOL

  6. Little Miss Kate on January 13, 2012 at 4:43 pm

    I expected the stretch on my stomach and was “ok” with that. But what the hell happened to my boobs!!! They got bigger and some tops were even more flattering when my DS was little. But now that we are winding down nursing… they just look deflated. Clothes don’t fit right anymore and it is frustrating!
    Now I am much more careful shopping, making sure that I find things that will flatter my assets (and hide the “defects”)

  7. Whispered Inspirations on January 13, 2012 at 5:43 pm

    Confession: If I can get away with it. I’d live in my Moo-Moo. LOL. I had it since I came home with Mimi and since its so comfy, I love wearing it. Motherhood does take adjustment, sometimes it takes us longer–sometimes we don’t need it. I can’t believe this March I will have been a mom for 8 years.

    Nuts.

  8. SassyModernMom on January 13, 2012 at 7:21 pm

    For me it is finding some Me time! Remember when you could go get your hair done without a sitter? Had time to grab coffee or spend money on those fab jeans for you instead of your babes:) No, you are so not alone, you are just one of the many fab Mamas doing the best she can every single day!

    PS Newest Follower!!

    • Ninja Mommers on January 13, 2012 at 8:07 pm

      WELL HELLO AND WELCOME!

      Thanks for the great comment. Thanks for making me feel not “so alone” 😀

  9. Orangeheromama on January 13, 2012 at 7:51 pm

    wow. this post seriously made me CRY.
    I absolutely LOVE LOVE my girls. They’re awesome!!
    But motherhood killed me. My stomach looks like ground beef. It’s revolting.
    And i have NO idea who i am anymore. I have pretty much lost me.

    My girls are 7 and 11.

    • Ninja Mommers on January 13, 2012 at 8:06 pm

      I relate to the ground beef stomach for sure. I too look revolting without a shirt on, and take my bra off… and then its even worse…

      The not knowing who you are anymore- I still have a vague Idea… I think …

  10. Christine (@chancesmommy) on January 13, 2012 at 9:35 pm

    Oooh! This post made me cry. I totally hear you, girlfriend. I have a secret. I sometimes lock myself in the bathroom to cry and so I can get 5 minutes of peace! LOL!

  11. Multi-Testing Mommy on January 14, 2012 at 9:31 pm

    I have to say just one thing?

    Lack of time to myself would be one and sagging boobs is another! LOL

    Cute post!

  12. Positively Pampered Patty on January 15, 2012 at 6:19 am

    Oh Ladies you are not going to like me. I refuse and I mean absolutely Refuse to look back at the body I had and wish I could have it back. I had 4 kids in 6 years, I have stretch marks, I have gained weight, my boobs after nursing 4 kids for 2 years each have changed. But I love where I am. I love my stretchmarks, they are my natural tattoos that adorn my body and show me where each of my children made a mark on my skin and not only in my heart. I am much bigger than I used to be. My breasts are not the perky ones they used to be, but they are full and soft and I love that they nursed 4 babies. I don’t want that girls body that I used to have. I want to keep this one, but I do plan on getting it in shape. So the body I used to have before kids will never compare. I wish you could all love yourselves where you are now.

    Life is so very short and looking back to what you used to be, longing for the body you used to have leaves you missing everything that is now. Love now, Live now, forget about yesterday. I am 100 pounds overweight and going to be 41 and I will be damned if I will not love who I am now, at the weight I am at, and the age I am at. I am so proud of this body. I adore it, yes even the jiggly, wiggly parts. I wish you all the very same.

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