NinjaMommers

A Rant to My Husband- A Stay at Home Moms Schedule

A Stay at Home Moms Schedule and A Look back at one of my faves from 2011….. 

Husband/Daddy and I got into a debate yesterday morning about why it is that he gets to call in sick to work, but when I am sick I just have to tough it out. He responded to me with: “You can lay down on the couch and relax at home, even for 1/2 and hour.. I can’t do that at work. It’s relaxing to be at home” So, instead of getting mad at him for thinking something so ridiculous I decided that documenting my day yesterday all day instead might be a little smarter….

This is for all you people that think that Stay at home Moms Sit around eating chocolate all day: 

A Stay at Home Mom’s Schedule – A Mommy’s “Relaxing” Day At Home 

6:35AM – Wake up, Make bed, open blinds, throw on the first pants I find not caring if they match. 

6:40AM–  Go downstairs, realize kitchen is a mess, take pot (I asked husband to clean up last night) and put it in the sink because now it needs to soak. 

6:45AM– Go back upstairs, Grab stuff needed for the day from our bedroom and bring it downstairs. Little Man wakes up. 

6:50AM– Go back upstairs, make sure Little Man is behaving and waiting patiently playing in his room. Grab the six cups that Husband/Daddy has brought upstairs for night time over the course of the week but never brought downstairs in the morning (funny because he goes down to go to work, could carry his cup down) bring the cups downstairs, load the dishwasher. 

6:59AM– Go back upstairs empty all the FULL garbages in the rooms (Supposed to be Husbands job, but he can’t even take his own cups downstairs so….) Put in a large garbage bag, bring downstairs and put all garbages in the kitchen in it. 

7:05AM – Husband Calls…. Oh Joy 

7:11AM – Bring Garbage outside, come back in 

7:15AM– Go upstairs, organize all laundry on the floor into a laundry basket (All laundry on the floor is on Husbands side of the bed and its mostly smelly socks) bring basket down the stairs. 

7:20AM – Go upstairs, get Little Man.. Change butt and bring down stairs. 

7:27AM– Get Little Man Breakfast and sit him at his table. 

7:30AM– Wash ALL dishes, including the cup Little Man requires for the day 

7:35AM– Little Man wants more cereal 

7:40AM– Finish Dishes, Little Man still eating 

7:44AM– Little Man finishes breakfast, tries to help by bringing bowl in (Better than his daddy already… your welcome future wife) But manages to make a huge mess while trying to put it in the sink. Thank Little Man for helping and clean up that mess. 

7:46AM– Wash Little Man’s Breakfast dishes 

7:49AM– Make myself some toast with Jam 

7:51AM– End up still hungry because Little Man stole 1/2 my breakfast 

7:55AM– Wash my breakfast dishes 

8:00AM– Little Man begs for a Popsicle… Refuses to get out of kitchen. Gets a time out. 

8:10AM– Wrote E-mail to Landlords in regards to a few small problems we have noticed around the house. 

8:15AM– Little Man now wants Goldfish crackers. 

8:20AM– When I say no Little Man attempts to get them himself. 

8:21AM– Sweep Goldfish off the floor 

8:25AM– Check E-mail for reply from Landlords. 

8:30AM– Clean Kitchen counters and stove 

8:40AM– Open refrigerator to grab a drink, stuff falls on me.. I decided its time to clean out the fridge already, too much garbage. 

9:00AM– Dog needs to be fed 

9:05AM– Clean floor by dog bowls, dog cant drink or eat without also painting the floor 

9:10AM– Give Little Man a snack and build a “Garage” out of blocks for his cars.. clean floor because apparently Little Man can’t eat or drink either without also painting the floor. 

9:20AM– Dog is doing her own version of the “Potty Dance” Time to take her outside (Have to take her on the leash in the front yard) 

9:30AM– Continue building “Garage” with Little Man 

10:00AM– Make Brownies, because I want them. 

10:20AM– Clean up all dishes from baking 

10:30AM– Sweep floor, check E-mail, Reply to Landlords E-mail 

11:00AM-Play with Little Man some more 

11:45AM– Bum Change 

NOON– Making Lunch 

12:15PM– Little Man deliberately pours juice all over the floor, Time out for him, He then helps clean it up 

12:30PM-Go back to making lunch 

12:40PM– Argue with Little Man about eating his lunch while he asks for a cookie instead… I get indigestion 

1:00PM– Do lunch dishes 

1:30PM– Bum Change Time… Giant Turd. When asked if he wants to use the potty response is NOT YET. 

1:40PM– Take Laundry BACK upstairs because Little Man keeps taking it out of the basket and throwing it all over the house. 

1:43PM– Sweep floor.. Yep.. again. 

1:55PM– Dog needs to pee again 

2:15PM– Avoid getting locked out by a Little Man while taking dog for a Piddle. 

2:20PM– Check job boards, send some resumes out for Husband. 

2:30PM– Ask Little man to clean up his books because he is slipping on them all over the floor and I don’t feel like taking a trip to the hospital. 

2:45PM– STILL making him clean up his books. 

2:50PM– Time out for throwing books 

3:00PM– FINALLY attempt to relax while Little Man plays quietly, sit down and turn on Dr. Phil 

3:15PM– Little Man playing with locks on the window, Warned about a Time-Out. 

3:16PM– Time out for playing with Window locks- No the cute face doesn’t negate the Time out 

3:20PM– Little Mans DIEING of thirst and NEEDS juice NOW before he parishes. 

3:30PM– Finally get to sit back down after cleaning up some more juice off the floor.. My mess this time.. 

3:45PM– Try to pee while Little Man bursts into the bathroom and tries to climb into the cupboard under the sink. 

3:50PM– Go outside to check the mail. Little man tries to lock me out, get my finger stuck in the door trying to stop him. 

3:55PM– Time Out for trying to lock me out 

4:00PM– Changing my Name to something hard to pronounce because if Little Man doesn’t stop repeating Mommy a million times for no reason I am going to lose it. 

4:05PM– Remove Little Man from the computer where he is violently pressing the keyboard… what did it ever do to him? 

4:06PM– Giant Turd bum change 

4:09PM– Spend forever walking down the stairs because Little man INSISTS he can walk down them himself as long as he holds onto the railing, He was right but it takes FOREVER. 

4:14PM– Turn on Diego as a distraction, have to pee again and would like to do so in peace. 

4:25PM– Call Husband/Daddy to see what is taking so long, says he left work late today and is now headed over to Uncle D’s house to pick up something unimportant that he left there yesterday. I tell him I have been busy and not feeling well all day and would really like his help and he replies with “I have been busy all day too, what the (Insert Explitive here) do you think I do all day?” I am thinking: “Yeah fine, I realize that but I don’t get a break to drive somewhere to pick up something unimportant at the end of the day and socialize with the outside world….” 

4:40PM– Time out Little Man pounding on Computer again. 

4:50PM– Clean up kitchen to make dinner, try to Keep Little Man distracted 

5:20PM– Start Dinner, Husband/Daddy STILL isnt home. 

5:21PM– Husband/Daddy Calls. I ask him sweetly if he plans on having dinner with Uncle D tonight, he sheepishly replies with a “No, I am just leaving now”… How nice. Lets me know he has to stop for gas on the way home…. Good for him. 

5:30PM– Making Dinner, Little man is starving to death and Husband/Daddy isn’t home yet. 

5:45PM– Husband/Daddy saunters through the door and heads upstairs to go change out of his work clothes, I try not to burn dinner. 

5:50PM– Dinner is ready, everyone is eating… 

6:15PM– Take dishes to kitchen, Let Husband/Daddy read my list… He volunteers to clean up and load the dishwasher… I agree… whole heartedly. 

6:30PM– Ask Little Man to clean up the play area, end up helping him. 

6:45PM– Bath time for Little Man, cart him upstairs and get him in the tub. 

7:15PM– Change, storytime, cuddles and bed. 

7:30PM– Finally decide I am going to have a shower…. Clean up Husbands clothes off the floor on the way… and punch out for the time being… 

Anyone who thinks THATS relaxing is more than welcome to Go Fly a Kite… In a thunderstorm.. With a Key attached to it….

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