There were a few things I would always say to myself when I was growing up, one of them was that I would NEVER, NEVER lick my thumb to wipe something off my child’s face, and the other was that I wouldn’t say some of the things my Mother said. Not even if someone paid me.
Well, I hate to admit that I have broken many a promise to my young self. Not only the promise that I wouldn’t ever leave the house in pajamas, (Guilty as charged…. almost daily), but both of the others outlined above. I lick my thumb to wipe the schmutz off of my children’s faces more times than I care to admit. Guess what? My kids hate it just as much as I did. I am sure their internal dialogue is the same as mine was: “Oh my gosh, why is my Mom so GROSS? I will NEVER do that to my kids. Her spit smells funny.” Except, child, you WILL do this. YOU WILL. The other thing is saying the things my Mom used to say to get me to do things, to reason with me or to just plain make me shush for one bloody second. I say many of them. I have even put my own unique spin on them.
Parenting Made me Sound like my Mother….
Because I said So
You see, sometimes the only answer to the million whys, can only be “Because I said so.”
Because I am an Adult That’s Why
“…BUT MOOOOOOM You get to stay up late! Why do YOU get to stay up late?” What am I supposed to say? “Child I have spent the last 10 years of my life earning the right to stay up late. I used to stay up late to hang out with my friends and not be able to find the key hole in the dark when I came home. Now I stay up late to clean your underpants. Trust me It’s not glamorous?” No! It’s MUCH easier to just use those painfully Mom sounding 7 Words.
I am NOT a Short Order Cook
You can eat what I give you, or don’t eat. Period. I am not a short order cook. It’s short. It’s to the point. Most of all it’s TRUE… I am so not making 4 different meals every night. Sorry.
What do I look Like? The Maid?
I am not the maid. If you need to throw something in the garbage, do it. Seriously. Do I look like the MAID?
Am I XYZ’s Mom?
The answer to this is always No. So, my response to that is always “Then don’t worry about what HIS mom lets him do. I am not HIS mom. I am YOUR Mom. I leave you notes in your lunch every day. I cut your sandwiches into hearts. I DO NOT let you watch the Walking Dead, so No. Not HIS mom. Yours.” You’re Welcome.
I Love you to the Moon and Back
It’s something I have always said to my kids and something my Mom has always said to me. I do love them to the moon and back.. because I said so, that’s why.