How to Get Rid of Mommy Guilt

As Mothers, we ALL know Mommy Guilt too well! It comes at the worst times, and stays around for what seems like years. As Mothers many feel guilty for almost everything we do, or do not do! Stop IT!

I am one to talk, recently my family took the kids for the weekend… YES THE ENTIRE WEEKEND! And I think I was having a coronary the entire time! I was literally freaking out, and the guilt set in quickly. I mean, a Kid free weekend? How could I possibly leave my kids for an entire weekend?! Well, guess what? I did, and it was glorious. But, alas, I was plagued by guilt that I slept in, I Was plagued by guilt that I enjoyed it even a little. I felt so bad for having a good time that the good time ended up feeling not so good.

How to Get Rid of Mommy Guilt?

Reflect– If you are feeling guilty about something you have done, take a breath and reflect. Did it hurt your kids? Is everyone still in tact? Were their lives in danger? Did you do something punishable by law (and no, not “Mommy Law” actual LAW)? If the answer to these questions is “No.” Then you need to realize that the guilt you are feeling is just plain pointless.

Push Through– Push through the feelings of guilt. Think positive. Your Children will be happier if you are happier, so stop worrying so much about ruining them, and just have fun! They will thank you!

Stop Thinking You Need to be Perfect– NO one is perfect. Get the perception that everything you do as a parent needs to be absolutely flawless out of your head! Everyone makes mistakes, you can’t do everything 100% spot on 100% of the time. The sooner you accept that imperfection doesn’t mean WRONG, the guilt will leave… don’t let the door hit it in the butt on the way out.

Everyone feels Mommy guilt at one time or another. Put it this way, if you haven’t knowingly put your children in physical danger or something stupendous then trust me, you are in the same guilt boat as many other mommys out there. Time to put on your life jacket and swim to shore… the guilt boat is no fun.

16 Comments

  1. Multi-Testing Mommy on May 3, 2012 at 11:42 am

    We recently just left both kids with my sister in law for the first time ever – it was our first time away just the two of us in 7 years (1 night). I had Mommy guilt like there was no tomorrow, but then I realized that this was a good experience and opportunity for all of us. My son had the opportunity to be independent from his parents at night – something that he needs to learn how to do! And my daughter, well, I knew she as loving every single second. They both did, actually. The guilt never disappeared, but that thought made me feel just a tad better.

    • Ninja Mommers on May 3, 2012 at 5:25 pm

      See?! It’s funny how the guilt plagues you but the kids probably had a fantastic time! Mine did when they went to my sister’s, in fact, Little Man keeps asking when he can go back lol.

  2. SoberJulie on May 3, 2012 at 12:36 pm

    Great post, I’m guilty of being that Mommy but get over it rather quickly thankfully.

    • Ninja Mommers on May 3, 2012 at 5:21 pm

      Thanks Julie! 🙂 I am glad you get over it quickly! Nothing like wallowing in guilt forever…. So I am glad you don’t!

  3. Ashley S on May 3, 2012 at 12:49 pm

    Amen to that!

  4. Lisa Marie on May 3, 2012 at 12:52 pm

    Ugh, so true. I’m a horrible mommy guilty person. The kids are happy, but I spend my whole time feeling horrible. And I guilt about EVERYTHING – working, vegging, thinking of doing something for myself, homeschooling, not doing enough with the kids….. it just piles on and on. Sigh. So hard. Great tips. I will try to take them to heart.

    • Ninja Mommers on May 3, 2012 at 5:20 pm

      Please try to take them to heart, you will get so much more out of your life if you do and your kids don’t sound like they are suffering 😛 Veg out once in a while… you deserve it… 🙂

  5. LaQuita (Just Us Girls) on May 3, 2012 at 4:21 pm

    So true, I’m a guilty mommy person at times, but then my husband usually lets me know how blessed our kids are and that I’m doing a great job.

    • Ninja Mommers on May 3, 2012 at 5:14 pm

      Aren’t Husbands the best!? (When they reassure us and support us, not so much when they leave their socks on the floor 😉 )

  6. Xiomara on May 3, 2012 at 4:25 pm

    I feel guilty leaving my toddler even for a few hours! But once I’m out there, whether it’s at the gym, therapy or a Mets game, I am so grateful for the time away from him. When I return, it makes me happy to see Equis’ face, and I allow myself to feel again just how much I missed him. A happy mom will make for a happy child!

  7. Julie (Suburban Moms Media) on May 3, 2012 at 4:37 pm

    “Your Children will be happier if you are happier, so stop worrying so much about ruining them” Advice I needed to hear this week and it’s so true! Thank you for this post! 🙂

    • Ninja Mommers on May 3, 2012 at 5:13 pm

      Glad you got what you needed to hear! 🙂 I am always happy when something I write benefits someone in some way! And it IS true, so smile…

  8. Brandy @InsaneMamacita on May 3, 2012 at 5:43 pm

    Ah, mommy guilt. We haven’t left the kids really yet (it’s long overdue, 7 years long). But sometimes I do feel guilty if I do do something for myself.

  9. Nicole @ Domesticated Momma on May 4, 2012 at 12:52 am

    Great post!!

  10. Shash on May 4, 2012 at 1:36 pm

    I had mommy guilt the first few times we left the kids with others to have alone time, but a decade plus has gone by and the kids are used to it and we’re better parents for it. Meaning, we need to reconnect as hubby and wife, to remember we’re more than mom and dad. being mom and dad… just isn’t sexy. 🙂 Enjoy your time together!!

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