Dear Santa, This is a mom’s Christmas wishlist. I am sure you know my name by now. The elf on the shelf has probably had some interesting things to report. Yes, I said fuck yesterday and yes, my kids heard me, but I have been such a fucking good girl this year that small detail […]
10 Top Reasons Teachers SUCK – or do They?
You see, teachers suck. They really do. I mean aren’t they terrible people? Who in their right mind would agree to spend all day with your unruly, snot nosed little sh– I mean angels? There MUST be something wrong with them. If your Child has been sent to the office, it CAN’T be because your […]
Sanctimommies, Momsplaining and Nonsensical Judgment
Let’s get a few things straight here. There are so many judgmental people out there in the world, and through my experience, Other Moms are the WORST for this. Being a Mom isn’t easy. In fact, it’s fucking hard. This shit is not for the weak, that I can tell you for certain. You know […]
10 Reasons My New Years Resolutions are BULLSHIT
OK. I said it. My new years resolutions are complete and utter BULLSHIT. I mean I make the same stupid new years resolutions every single cot damned year. Every single stupid mediocre, common resolution that you can think of… I have resolved to do it one year or the other. My Previous Garbage New Years Resolutions […]
Social Parenting: Stop Caring About Other Parents On Social Media!
With social media at our fingertips and the ability for parents everywhere to spread the word about what their child is doing, how they are parenting and so on and so forth, it’s no wonder we all get caught up in what other parents are doing. Social media can quickly become a game of trading […]
That Time The Internet Annoyed Me
This is a thing. The internet has annoyed me. I mean, I freaking love the internet, I love the people I have met, the people that read this crap I write, the people that can relate to my insanity and the people that can put up with it. I love the funny stories, the satirical […]
Doorbell Etiquette – Never Knock or Ring My Doorbell After 7pm
Do you know proper doorbell etiquette? I had solicitors at my door the other night. It was 8:30pm. The kids had finally drifted off to dream land and I was ready to relax and quietly watch some television. Instead, I decided that perhaps cleaning my toilet was more important than TV, so I was arm […]
Kids With Cell Phones: Why My Children Won’t Have Cell Phones Until They Can Buy One Themselves
I was picking my 7 year old up from school they other day and I saw all these kids with cell phones. They were filing out of the school doors like completely distracted drones. Many of them had phones in their hands either listening to music, or texting, or sharing photos… Many were the same […]
Fussy Eaters- Why I Won’t Allow my Kids to be Picky Eaters
I have been told that there is a difference between fussy eaters and picky eaters. Apparently, a fussy eater is someone that can like something one day and change their mind the next day. A picky eater is defined as someone that has a reluctance to try new foods, which can limit the foods that […]
The Age of Entitlement- Parents Policing Parents about Gift Giving
Oh Parents policing Parents is a wonderful thing isn’t it? I have seen so many different posts on Facebook authored by Mothers who are angry, angry that other parents are getting their children large gifts. Angry that other parents are out there buying their children gifts for St. Patrick’s day. Angry that some parents are […]
The Battle for the Sidewalk- Teach Your Children SINGLE FILE
I swear if one more adolescent pushes me off the sidewalk because they can’t go single file I’m going to scream. Every single morning, after I am finished walking my kids to school, I walk home. Alone. Every single morning, I have to fight through swarms of adolescents on their way to school. They don’t […]
An Open Letter to The Amber Alert Complainers
On a Sunday night in 2016 around 9:30pm EST the OPP used the new and enhanced Amber Alert program for the first time. The alert sounded a loud, repetitive alarm that disrupted the sound on Television shows, to alert viewers about a missing boy through a large pop up on the screen. The police were trying […]
When Mom is Sick, No one Cares
Is it true that when Mom is sick no one cares? I am not sure 100% sure, but honestly, it sure as heck seems that way. My 4 year old daughter came down with a brutal cold on Monday of last week. She was coughing, sneezing and snotting all over everything in her path. In […]
Dear Family, The House Doesn’t Clean Itself
Dear Family, I have news for you. BIG NEWS! You won’t believe it. Are you ready? The house doesn’t clean itself. There. I said it! We are not the owners of a fancy self cleaning house, although that does sound spectacular. Wait, what? You don’t believe me? Dear Family, Listen to me, that porcelain throne […]
Why I am Grounded from Symptom Googling
I am grounded from symptom googling. I am not kidding. Grounded. Why you may ask? That’s a loaded question. First off, I have explained that I have Anxiety and it’s not easy. So there is a factor…. I mean, anxiety does make small concerns feel like big ones sometimes, even without google. What is Symptom Googling? […]
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